PILLAR OF SUPPORT

 The things a woman must do to have a successful marriage.

PILLAR OF SUPPORT

The strongest impact a woman aiming to make a difference in her marriage is to act as a pillar of support for that marriage. Pillar of support is actually an all encompassing word and include all the ingredients of a motherly role, sister and friend combined to compliment the man’s effort in moving the marriage forward. The man expects total reliance on the woman. Every mother for instance, shows love, understanding, communicates, refusing to give up on her child etc that is what a man expects from a wife. At the same time a true friend should be able to lay down his life for another and so on for a sister etc.

With the combination of these virtues in a woman a man will go at length to satisfy that woman. The woman would hold a special place in the heart of the man.

It is sad these days to see women create so many gaps between them and their spouses by their utterances and actions and still expect the marriage to succeed.

Be committed to the success of the marriage. When some people are committed to the success of a thing, they give it their best in order for it to succeed. In the same vein, commitment to the success of the marriage should be of utmost priority in every woman’s agenda.

 Pay close attention and communicate regularly with your spouse. Some women call their husband their lord and that is how it should be seen. A wife who wants to distinguish herself in marriage should learn to communicate regularly and pay close enough attention to her husband. Communication holds the key to every successful marriage and in fact bridges the gap we inadvertently create in our marriage, when a woman imbibes this art; she is much more likely to see a great change in her marriage. Communication and attention should transcend beyond the ordinary and even goes to the minute details of the marriage which may be sex or issues effecting the children, house keep etc.

Be appreciative and never criticize unnecessarily, another crucial step for a woman to creating a successful marriage is to appreciate the man you have no matter what and regardless of the situation. Appreciating your spouse i.e., being grateful that you have him and never confront or unnecessarily criticizing him are effective weapons to strengthen the foundation of that marriage.

Encourage and learn to respect him. The problem here is that most women have become so familiar with their husband that they hardly respect their spouse again not to talk of encouraging him. Familiarity is good in marriage but the moment it begins to degrade your spouse effort it becomes questionable. Again encouraging your spouse can take the form of trying to know from time to time to know what is happening in his business or work place, health etc thereby showing some level of concern.

Never assume anything and learn to forgive.  The issue here is that wrong assumption especially on part of the woman towards her   spouse and bearing or nursing grudges overtime have rocked rather than strengthen most marriage institutions. Clearly discuss issues as they arise and also have a forgiving heart when you are offended as these will help to solidify that union. Women should learn to stop carrying bag gages at any point in time in their marriage

Be happy and humorous. Women should go extra mile to lighten up, stop carrying burdens or act as if the world is about to collapse under your feet. Be humorous, search for happiness, Remember, challenges will always come and go but your sagacity is what matters. 

Other critical steps to strengthen the foundation of most marriages and create happiness are for the women to be physically intimate with their spouse, be transparent in your dealings, fulfill your responsibilities as a wife and focus on the long term vision which is to help the man by helping the marriage succeed.

Finally, women should know that creating an ideal home starts by getting clear on what they want and choosing to create it are the ideal qualities or ingredients that will make a happy home.